I love it when a plan comes together. There is something so satisfying about being on the other side of a well-executed plan. Whether it’s checking off items on a “to-do” list or basking in the aftermath of a successful event, getting things done; to me, is like scoring a touchdown is to a football player.
Consequently, when plans begin to unravel and what I’ve done becomes undone it COMPLETELY throws me off! Over the years, I’ve gotten better at rolling with the punches. But, this is still a source of frustration. Particularly, when it comes to my life and time.
So, as you can imagine God and I have a hard time seeing eye to eye sometimes. I’ve been in a relationship with Him long enough now that I know not to make any plans without consulting Him first. If I’m honest, most times I already have a plan in mind when I talk to Him. Moreover, when I pray “thy will be done”, what I’m REALLY saying is “God, this is the way I want it to be, isn’t this the way you want it to be?” (Hence my earlier statement about seeing eye to eye)
On sabbatical, I’m learning to put away the list and the pre-scripted next steps when I go to God. I practice sitting in solitude and emptying my mind. I’m developing active listening habits (that I thought I already had). I’m trying not to ‘direct the scene’ of my life. This is hard. But, I am not the Director of the motion picture that is my life. I have to be willing to give up my plans and my will so that when the credits roll and the “End Scene” is called I can look back and give praise for a well-executed life.